Question: [Tuesday, 8th MarCheshvan 5783]
The first Yartzite of my mother is next month. My question is whether it is permitted for me to Daven for the Amud in the 13th month, being that she passed away in a leap year. I already finished the 12 months of mourning, and hence have one month before the Yartzite in which I am no longer an Avel. I am asking because the Gabaiy asked me to Daven for the Amud on Shabbos, and I did not know if I could.
In the 13th month of the mourning during a leap year, you may Daven for the Amud on Shabbos and Yom Tov without issue. However, during the weekdays, the custom is to avoid doing so even during the 13th month.
Explanation: The custom is to avoid Davening for the Amud in the 12th month, when one has stopped the saying of Kaddish. However, the reason for this avoidance for Davening for the Amud after the 11th month of mourning is different between Shabbos and Yom Tov versus weekdays. The reason for the avoidance on Shabbos and Yom Tov is because he has heavenly judgment hovering over him until the completion of the 12 months of mourning. This reason is no longer relevant in the 13th month of a leap year, and hence there is no issue with him Davening for the Amud in the 13th month. However, the reason for the avoidance during the weekdays is because we do not want to consider the relative as a Rasha who is still in Gihennom in the 12th month. This reason can continue to apply also in the 13th month, and hence the widespread custom is to also avoid Davening for the Amud in the 13th month. Nonetheless, on occasion there is no issue to Daven for the Amud during the weekday.
Sources: See regarding avoiding weekday Davening in 12th month: Kneses Hagedola 403 in name of Maharil 22; Rav Poalim 3:32; Mishmeres Shalom Taf 35; Sheiris Simcha 48; Nitei Gavriel 53:21 in name of Poskim; See regarding avoiding even in 13th month: Sheiris Simcha 48; Nitei Gavriel ibid footnote 34 in name of Poskim; See regarding avoiding Shabbos and Yom Tov Davening: Rama 376:4; Teshuvas Maharil; M”A 581:4 See regarding avoiding even in 13th month: P”M 660 M”Z 2 regarding Hakafos on Sukkos; Sdei Chaim p. 14 32; Piskeiy Teshuvos 581 footnote 81; Nitei Gavriel 56:8