Question:
I was by a Sephardic Minyan and was motioned to go up to the Torah, and when I told the Gabaiy my name he did not repeat it and officially call me up and simply encouraged me to begin the Aliyah. Was this an anomaly or is this indeed the Sephardic custom?
Answer:
Indeed, the age old Sephardic custom of many communities is not to call the Olah by name and rather the Gabbai simply motions to him to go up. The reason for this is the Talmud states that one who refuses an Aliyah has his life shortened r”l, and hence the Sephardim are careful not to call anyone up by name just in case they may refuse the Aliya, in order so they do not fall under the above Talmudic danger. This is in contrast to the age-old Ashkenazi custom dating back to the times of the Geonim to call up the person by name. To note, that the above Sephardic custom is not widespread in all Sephardic communities, and there exists for communities such as the Yemenite community, which call up by name. It is also unclear as to exactly when the above Sephardic custom began, as its first record in the literature base back to the 17th century and not earlier.
Sources: See Asufos 14 pp. 275-294 Sephardic custom: Shiyurei Kneses Hagedola 139:1, 4; Chida in Chaim Sheol 1:13; Kaf Hachaim 139:9; Nehar Mitzrayim Hilchos Kerias Hatorah 7b; Keser Shem Tov 1 p. 243; Ashkenazi custom: Rama 139:3; Tanchuma Bereishis 29:5; Seder Rav Amram Gaonm; Machzor Vitri; Sefer Chassidim 791; Shut Maharam Ben Baruch 108; Ravayah 2:577; Terumas Hadeshen 1:21; Maharam Padwah 87; See Avnei Nezer C.M. 103; Ketzos Hashulchan 85:1; Piskeiy Teshuvos 139:2-4; See regarding refusing an Aliya after being called up: Brachos 55a, brought in M”A 53:22; Kol Bo 118; Elya Raba 139:2; Levush 428: on Rama 428:6; Peri Chadash 139:1; P”M 53 A”A 22; Levushei Serud 138; Lev Chaim 2:174 and 3:12 [See there that one time a person was called to the Torah and he ran out and he was later burnt to death within 30 days, as the Torah is called fire]; Toras Chaim Sofer 139:1; Aruch Hashulchan 139:4; M”B 139:1; Kaf Hachaim 139:3; 428:40; Tzitz Eliezer 14:34; See Midrash Tanchuma Yisro 15; Shemos Raba 40; It is however omitted from the Rambam, Tur and Michaber:Rama [see Elya Raba and Toras Chaim Sofer ibid for explanations of this omission] See also Levush 428, brought in Machatzis Hashekel 428, and M”B 428:19 who omit this; See Sefer Shemiras Haguf Vihanefesh [Lerner] 262:1 footnote 1-2
Question:
Is it permitted for two girls to sleep on the same bed? We are having a Shabbaton for high school girls and do not have enough beds in our location for every girl to sleep in their own bed?
Answer:
From the letter of the law it is permitted to sleep in the same bed [unlike the law regarding boys] although practically it should be avoided. Accordingly, you should bring blowup mattresses for those girls who don’t have a bed.
Sources: Letter of law: Setimas Kol Haposkim; See Mishneh Zavim 4:1; Kesef Mishneh Mitamei Mishkav Umoshav 9:4; Practical Avoidance: See Shabbos 65a “Avuha Deshmuel would not allow his daughters to sleep together” While the worry of sin between two women is not on the level of severity as the sin of two men, nonetheless, practically, doing so can cause forbidden feelings to be aroused within a girl, and hence practically it is to be avoided not just in order to prevent sinful temporary thoughts, but also to prevent a possible lust from entering the persons heart which may take years to battle and overcome. וד”ל ואין להאריך בדבר שהצניעות יפה לו והארכנו כבר די והותר וכל מי שיש לו מוח בקדקדו ויודע מצב הדור מבין חשיבות הענין
Does not remember if already completed the blessing of Sim Shalom
Question:
I was towards the end of Shemoneh Esrei, and suddenly got distracted by something that happened in shul. When I returned to concentrate I could not remember if I had already completed the blessing of Sim Shalom or not, what should I do?
Answer:
You should repeat from Ritzei. The reason for this is because this doubt is considered a mistake in the blessing, and whenever a mistake is made within the first or last three blessings, we require one to repeat, as we rule regarding Mashiv Haruach [for Nussach Ashkenaz], Yaaleh Veyavo, Hamelech Hakadosh and so on.
Sources: See Chayeh Adam 24:21; Ben Ish Chaiy Mishpatim 10 regarding first three blessings
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