Cross-dressing – The prohibition of Lo Silbash Full Article

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17. Cross-dressing-Lo Silbash:[1]

A. The prohibition:

A woman may not wear the clothing of a man, such as to place on herself a male turban, or male hat, or wear a shield and the like. She may likewise not get a male haircut. Likewise, a man may not wear the clothing of a woman, such as to wear colored female clothing, or a gold necklace, in those areas that these clothing and ornaments are only worn by women.[2] The general rule is, any clothing that is customarily worn in one’s area by only one gender, is forbidden to be worn in that area by the opposite gender.[3] [Thus, in most areas of the world, it would be forbidden for men to wear a skirt. However, in Scotland, it would be permitted to wear kilts.] One who transgresses the above, transgresses a Biblical negative command and is liable for lashes.[4]

Wearing a single garment of the opposite gender:[5] It is forbidden to wear even a single garment of the opposite gender, even though one’s gender remains recognizable due to other clothing that he is wearing. [One who transgresses the above, transgresses a Biblical negative command and is liable for lashes.[6]]

Tumtum/Androgynous:[7] It is forbidden for a Tumtum or Androgynous to dress like a woman. [It is, however, also forbidden for them to shave their hair like a man.[8]]

 

The reason behind the prohibition:[9]

Two reasons are recorded in Rishonim:

·         Some[10] write the reason behind this prohibition is because cross-dressing leads to promiscuity.

·         Others[11] write the reason is because idolaters practiced cross-dressing. 

 

B. Cases of exception:

Wearing clothing of the opposite gender due to the cold, or for purposes of shade, or Tznius: Many Poskim[12] rule the prohibition of Lo Silbash only applies when one wears clothing of the opposite gender for the purpose of resembling the opposite gender.[13] It is however permitted for one to wear the clothing of the opposite gender for other purposes, such as to protect one from the cold, or from the sun [or for other purposes]. Other Poskim[14] however rule that doing so is forbidden. [Practically, one may be lenient in this matter in a time of need.[15]] This, however, only applies if one’s gender is still recognizable. It is however forbidden in all cases to wear clothing of the opposite gender in a way that his gender is no longer recognizable.[16] However, some Poskim[17] are lenient even in such a case.

Garments and items that are not ornaments of beauty: Some Poskim[18] rule that the prohibition of Lo Silbash only applies towards garments and items that are ornaments for a woman and make her look beautiful. However, other items are permitted to be worn by a man, even if he does so for the purpose of appearing like a woman. Other Poskim[19] however question this ruling.

Wearing out of jest and fun/Purim/Chasana:[20] It is accustomed on Purim [and by Chasunas[21]] to allow males to wear the clothing of females, and vice versa.[22] [However, many Poskim[23] challenge this custom[24] and thus, practically, one is not to do so. Some write it is to be avoided even by children.[25] If it is recognizable that the person is a man or woman, and he or she merely wears a single clothing of the opposite gender, there is room to be lenient.[26] The Rebbe in one letter expressed contempt for those who cross-dress for playful purposes, however it is unclear if this refers to completely dressing like the opposite gender, or even wearing a single garment.[27]]

 

Q&A

Does the prohibition against cross-dressing apply even if someone else places the clothing on oneself?[28]

Yes. This prohibition applies even if a gentile places the clothing on him.

 

Does the prohibition against cross-dressing apply even if one plans to remove the clothing right after trying them on?[29]

Yes. The prohibition applies even against wearing the clothing of the opposite gender for a mere moment.

May one cross-dress in the privacy of his room, not in the view of others?[30]

No.

May one wear under clothing of the opposite gender that is not apparent to outside view?[31]

No. A Rabbinical prohibition applies even if people cannot see that one is wearing the clothing of the opposite gender.

May one wear clothing of the opposite gender in an irregular way, such as to wear a woman’s blouse around his neck as a scarf?[32]

This matter requires further analysis. Practically, one is not to do so unless he is cold and the like.

May one wear his wife’s socks or undershirts if he desires?

One may do so for clothing purposes if he does not have any socks, or undershirts available. It is forbidden to do so for purposes of appearing like a woman.

If one realized that he wore his wife’s sock or undershirt, must he remove it?

If one is unable to change into other clothing, it is permitted to remain wearing it.[33] If, however, one is able to change into men’s socks or undershirt, then he is to do so.

May women wear pants?[34]

It is forbidden for women to wear pants. This applies even towards women pants that are made specifically for women and are not worn by men.[35] In the latter case, it is disputed as to whether this prohibition is due to Lo Silbash or only due to reasons of modesty.[36]

Under a skirt: Women are not initially to wear pants outside even for protection from the cold, and even if they wear a skirt on top.[37] However, in a time of need, one may be lenient.[38] [See below regarding skiing]

Children: It is forbidden for girls who have reached the age of three years old to wear pants.[39] Some Poskim[40] rule it is even forbidden prior to this age.[41] Practically, girls below three years old may wear girl pants[42], however they are not to wear pants of boys unless there is no other clothing available and they need to wear it to protect them from the cold or the sun.[43]

May a woman wear pants while skiing?

Some Poskim[44] rule it is forbidden to do so.[45] Practically, however, if she is wearing it in order to protect her from the cold, or for Tznius purposes, then she may wear pants under a skirt for extra modesty and protection.[46] It is forbidden to go skiing without a skirt due to reasons of modesty.]

May women wear pajama pants?

Some Poskim[47] rule it is forbidden for women or girls to wear pajama pants even at night in an only girl’s room, and even if it is worn under a nightgown, unless she is wearing it to protect from the cold.[48] Other Poskim[49] however rule that pajama pants are permitted to be worn in private, while not in the presence of other men. Practically, it is permitted for women and girls to wear women pajama pants in private, under a nightgown or long T-shirt, for Tznius purposes or in order to protect from the cold, and so is the widespread custom even amongst Chassidic and G-d fearing women.[50] They are however not to wear the pants in front of other men that are in the house.

 

May one dress children in clothing of the opposite gender?[51]

Children or all ages [even below Chinuch and even a baby] may not wear clothing of the opposite gender unless there is no other clothing available and they need to wear it to protect from the cold or the sun.[52]

 

May children cross dress for a skit, play and the other purposes of the like?

This matter is subject to the same dispute mentioned regarding cross-dressing on Purim, or for a wedding. Practically, if it is recognizable that the person is a man or woman, and he or she merely wears a single clothing of the opposite gender, there is room to be lenient.[53] Nonetheless, the Rebbe expressed contempt for children who cross-dress for school plays and the like.[54]

_____________________________________________

[1] Yoreh Deah 182:5; Rambam Avodas Kochavim 12:10; Nazir 59a; Parshas Ki Seitzei “Lo Yihyeh Keli Gever..” “Lo Yilbash Gever Simlas Isha”

[2] Michaber ibid

[3] Rama 182:5

[4] Taz 182:6; Chinuch Mitzvas 542 [women cross-dressing] 543 [Men cross-dressing]; Rambam Sefer Hamitzvos Mitzvah 40; In Hilchos Avodas Kochavim it is listed as two Mitzvos;

[5] Rama ibid; Chochmas Adam 90:1

[6] Taz 182:6

[7] Rama ibid

[8] Shach 182:8; Kol Bo; Rambam

[9] See Arugas Habosem 138:4

[10] Chinuch Mitzvas 542-543; Rashi Dvarim 22:5; See Nazir 59a that it is a Toeiva

[11] Rambam Moreh Nevushim 3:37, brought in Chinuch ibid

[12] Shach 182:7 in name of Bach; Taz 182:4; Avnei Tzedek 72; Shraga Hameir 7:124 that the Shach agrees with the Bach on this matter; See Darkei Teshuvah 182:9; See also Admur 301:6 based on M”A 301:16 and Gemara Shabbos that a female ring is not considered a Shinuiy for a man to carry through wearing on his finger on Shabbos, being that at times, during the week, they wear it on their finger to bring it to be fixed. Thus, we see that if one wears the item for non-cross-dressing purposes, it is permitted

[13] The reason: As the verse states “Eideiy Isha” which refers to ornaments that beautify a woman and make her appear like a woman. [see Taz ibid]

[14] Yad Haketana 2:6 [p. 279], brought in Darkei Teshuvah 182:9; Binas Adam 90:94; The Shach ibid questions the ruling of the Bach, although some write that his question is not relating to this matter, of which he also agrees; See Divrei Chaim 2:62 [prohibits even to prevent pain]; Maharsham 2:243; Yabia Omer 6:14-4

[15] Shraga Hameir 7:124; Maharsham 2:243 rules one may only be lenient if it is recognizable to the viewer that one is doing so due to the cold and the like; Bach ibid writes one may be lenient because one has no other choice; See Minchas Yitzchak 2:108-4

[16] Shach ibid; Bach brought in Taz Yoreh Deah 182:4 [Taz concludes “One who is stringent is blessed”]; Yireim 96; Teshuvas Harambam; Shalah; Kneses Hagedola; M”B 696:30; Kisei Eliyahu 696:3; Birkeiy Yosef 696:13 and Yoreh Deah 182:3; Beis Oved 696:10; Kaf Hachaim 696:57; Aruch Hashulchan 696:12

[17] Rama 696:8 regarding Purim; Mahriy Mintz 16; Hisorerus Teshuvah 500

[18] Bach, brought in Shach 182:7

[19] Shach ibid

[20] Rama 696:8; Mahriy Mintz 16; Hisorerus Teshuvah 500

[21] Yireim 96, brought in Taz Yoreh Deah 182:4; Shach 182:7

[22] The reason and other opinions: This is not forbidden due to the cross-dressing prohibition as the intent is for mere joy [as opposed to promiscuity]. Nevertheless, according to some opinions, there remains a prohibition for a man to wear women’s clothing, or vice versa, even in such a case. Practically the custom is like the lenient opinion. [Rama ibid]

[23] Bach brought in Taz Yoreh Deah 182:4 [Taz concludes “One who is stringent is blessed”]; Shach 182:7; Yireim 96; Teshuvas Harambam; Shalah; Kneses Hagedola; M”B 696:30; Kisei Eliyahu 696:3; Birkeiy Yosef 696:13 and Yoreh Deah 182:3; Beis Oved 696:10; Kaf Hachaim 696:57; Aruch Hashulchan 696:12

[24] The reason: As the allowance to wear clothing of the opposite gender for mere playfulness is only in a case that one does not appear like the opposite gender, being that he/she remains wearing clothing of also his/her gender. [See Shach ibid and Atzei Levona 182]

[25] Piskeiy Teshuvos 696:14; Nitei Gavriel 75:7

[26] P”M 696 M”Z 4; M”B 696:30 in name of P”M; Implication of Shach 182:7 as explained in Atzei Levona

[27] Igros Kodesh 10:238, printed in Shulchan Menachem 5:56, Regarding the plays that take place from time to time, it is very proper in general, although one must be careful to beware from those matters that many people transgress even though they involve a Torah transgression, such as for women not to wear the garmnets of a man and the like.

[28] Maharsham 2:243

[29] See Minchas Chinuch 543:1 that one who cross-dresses and was warned many times while wearing it, is liable for lashes each time he was warned, just like the law by Kilayim, and by Kilayim it is forbidden to wear it for even a mere moment. [Rambam Kilayim 10:30]

[30] Minchas Yitzchak 2:108-3; Betzeil Hachochma 5:126

[31] See Beis Yosef 182 that if the clothing are “concealed from the eye, then even though they are different between a man and a woman, since they are not apparent to the outside, they are not included in the Biblical prohibition” as they cannot lead towards an abomination”; See however Ohel Yaakov 182:20 that many Achronim are stringent in this matter that it is nevertheless Rabbinically forbidden.

[32] See Betzeil Hachochma 5:126 for an analysis on this subject

[33] As he has no intent to look like a woman by wearing it in order.

[34] Minchas Yitzchak 2:108; Shevet Halevi 2:63; See Ohel Yaakov 188:44-45

[35] The reason: As pants is mainly a men’s clothing and hence it is considered Beged Ish for a woman to wear it even if it is a woman’s style. [Minchas Yitzchak ibid; Shevet Halevi ibid] In addition, these clothing are Bigdei Zima, clothing of promiscuity, which shape a woman’s legs, thighs and private area. [Minchas Yitzchak ibid; Shevet Halevi ibid] Some Poskim however rule that women pants which are different than men pants, do not contain Beged Ish as it is not similar to men’s clothing, although it would nevertheless be forbidden due to being immodest. [See Avnei Tzedek Y.D. 72; Mishneh Halachos 12:353]

[36] See previous footnote

[37] The reason: Although doing so is not forbidden due to Beged Ish, being she is wearing it for protection from the cold, nevertheless it is not a modest and elegant form of dress.

[38] Avnei Tzedek Y.D. 73; Shevet Halevi 2:63; See Minchas Yitzchak ibid

The reason: As according to most Poskim, it does not transgress Lo Silbash being she is not intending to wear it in order to resemble a man, and even according to the dissenting Poskim, if she is wearing women pants, perhaps they do not at all contain a prohibition of Lo Silbash. Regarding modesty, since the pants is covered by a skirt it does not present any prohibition.

[39] The reason: As starting from three years of age we educate a girl to dress modestly. Furthermore, once she reaches the age of Chinuch, it is forbidden for her to wear men’s clothing.

[40] Minchas Yitzchak 2:108

[41] The reason: As it is forbidden to feed children a prohibition even from one day old. [See Admur 343:2] Furthermore, by Lo Silbash, perhaps the person who places the clothing onto another also transgresses. [Minchas Yitzchak ibid] 

[42] As a) They are different than boys pants and do not contain Lo Silbash [Avnei Tzedek Y.D. 72 and perhaps even according to Minchas Yitzchak 2:108 and Shevet Halevi 2:63 they would agree that by a toddler it is not considered at all a boys clothing any more than a girl being that so is the common practice] B) There is no immodesty involved, as they are below the age of three.

[43] See Minchas Yitzchak ibid

The reason: As it is forbidden for an adult to dress even a child with men’s clothing as it is forbidden to feed a prohibition to a child of any age.

[44] Minchas Yitzchak 2:108

[45] The reason: As although many Poskim rule a woman may wear men’s clothing to protect her from the cold and the like, nevertheless, here she is placing herself into the situation, and in this case, according to all Poskim we tell her simply not to go skiing and thus not have a need to wear the pants, [Minchas Yitzchak ibid]

[46] See Avnei Tzedek Y.D. 73; Shevet Halevi 2:63

The reason: As according to most Poskim it does not transgress Lo Silbash being she is not intending to wear it in order to resemble a man. It is difficult to accept the argument of the Minchas Yitzchak ibid as if so “Nasnu Devarecha Leshiurim.”

[47] Minchas Yitzchak 2:108

[48] The reason: As the prohibition of Lo Silbash applies even when wearing the clothing in private, not in front of men. [ibid]

[49] See Avnei Tzedek Y.D. 73 and Rivivos Efraim 5:534 and Ohel Yaakov p. 308 in name of Rav Elyashiv and Rav Wozner and many Poskim of today that pajama pants do not contain the prohibition of Lo Silbash as they are not men’s clothing at all and are not made to appear in public

[50] Avnei Tzedek Y.D 73

The reason: As according to most Poskim it does not transgress Lo Silbash being she is not intending to wear it in order to resemble a man.

[51] Igros Moshe 4:62-3

[52] See Minchas Yitzchak ibid

The reason: As it is forbidden for an adult to dress even a child with men’s clothing, as it is forbidden to feed a prohibition to a child of any age. [Minchas Yitzchak ibid, based on Admur 343:2]

[53] P”M 696 M”Z 4; M”B 696:30 in name of P”M; Implication of Shach 182:7 as explained in Atzei Levona

[54] Igros Kodesh 10:238, printed in Shulchan Menachem 5:56

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